No longer afraid

I’m not afraid
of being alone in the dark
As long as I remember
I first met Him

Easy to remember
is my first encounter
when joy filled my heart
when tears turned to laughter
for the very first time

It was and is a divine connection
forever He holds me
forever I belong

I needed the dark and lonely
to let go of my ego
my survival strategies

With Him by my side
on my inside
and all around
Life’s journey
always learning
how to see
touch, taste, feel and hear

With my soul sense
to grace, love and purity
that will last for all eternity

So now my life
becomes ever brighter
the sun has arisen in my heart
ever more connected, larger
walking in communion
with the One
who leads me
on the journey
of Union

He and She
(must be, how else? lots of people are women)
draws me
into community

And then when the large
emotional waves
of dark and lonely
crash over me
tumble me under
I might be bruised on the rocks
I might bleed a little or a lot

But it’s alright
in the end I always land
with my feet on the sand

not to be afraid
He is still there
in the dark and lonely
He is also there
He is everywhere

Sometimes I need
the dark and lonely
to remind me of this
so I don’t start to fear
all over again
adjusting my walk and my journey
for it
Just to know
I can go there
it will be

So the dark and lonely
becomes a gift
that gives me courage
that gives me wings

So I can reveal
my own ‘I am’
As I fly with Him
whose always been.

What are you afraid of? How does fear affect your life? What helps you to be less afraid? How do you imagine your life without fear?

My biggest fear has always been of not being loved, of being left behind or left out. This fear was largely based on a core belief that I was not lovable, not good enough and being left out was merely what I deserved. It’s a terrible way to feel and I’m really grateful that the power of that feeling in my heart has been broken.  The effect on my life is taking some time to heal, but it’s all good.

God is good.

In the end it is all good.

If it is not good, it is not the end.

When it is all good, there will be no end.

It will be another beginning.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s