Suffocation

Fear and anxiety Insecurity Distorted perception Suspicion, sarcasm a form of aggression Denial of all these the doors shut to healing only the perpetuity of all the feelings loneliness, shame, longing Love just a myth all those who appear to have it therefore just pretending which is a form of lying and herein lies the…

Slow down or race right along

Chasing is exhausting Yet we chase We are born into the race And so we learn to hurry up From early on Tired the norm Our state of being Hard to remember Anyway There is no time for that Remembering Life’s too short for that Who wants to live in the past Anyway Let alone…

Kill the snake?

I don’t know. I simply don’t know. Too many things I have been certain of have become illogical and childish now. Now I can only question and wonder and seek a way to be my own true self and live with responsibility. ¬†The snake and the dragon, one real, one imagined… beautiful, dangerous creatures for…

The Emperor’s clothes

Comparisons and Contradictions Paradigms and Paradoxes Irony and Incongruency Metaphors and Relativity Conscience and Consciousness I’ve been trapped in the realm of linearity of one-dimensional dogmatism Where the dogs are vicious they growl and bite they also want to get out of this prison this lesser than smallest non-space of gruelling greyness false hope daily…

Laughing again

There is agony and ecstacy in living deeply with awareness rather than hiding and lying to ourselves as we pass through our days just existing or surviving So I choose awareness questioning and risk I allow myself to question the reason and feel the emotion by which I live I consider the longings¬†and desires buried…

Disillusion

I’ve been here silent all these years emotions and thoughts imprisoned in fear locked up with keys of guilt and shame so my heart was grey with grief so much to say to share no voice no confidence So I mostly existed disconnected dull defeated but refused to be blinded to the divinity that dwells…

Unravelled

For me, writing is a form of healing. It is a way of figuring things out, of trying to capture the feeling of something that is hard to explain. What I write does not necessarily relate to specific events or people, but rather to patterns of life, discoveries and explorations of feeling and meaning. For…

Unhidden

“Authenticity flows out of truthfulness and it is the only way to find acceptance. From the place of acceptance of what is real/true, transformation can take place, spiritual growth is possible. Without this, the willingness to be truthful, pretense becomes the only alternative.” from the Alchemy of Voice by Stewart Pearce (I think) So if…

Expansion

I’ve been looking for space more space inner space outer space living space breathing space not exactly astronaut space just more place to move and breathe and have my being space to discover me without judgement without criticism without rejection ouch! that awful word and feeling that made the me withdraw masks and pretense is…

Deliverance from Limerence

Lost looking for love not knowing how safe feels only desolate desperate alone yet hoping dreaming risking despite the fear anxiety not knowing that this perception deception is inevitable rejection thinking this might lead to love go out on dates have fun, be mates but there was no sweet connection a sick kind of joke…